It’s my personal experience and therefore belief that in order for you to experience success at any level and at any event in life, you need to be able to take ownership (or responsibility) for everything that happens to you.
Own your wins in life, that’s often an easy one; but also own your shortcomings. Analyse and understand where you went wrong and where you will improve for next time.
It’s impossible to make the same mistake twice because the second time you knew what the outcome would be. You’ve experienced it.
If you want to succeed you need to stop making excuses for yourself to fail. Near enough is never good enough, and you need to own that.
Don’t misinterpret what I am saying. This is not about ‘blame’. I am not asking you to blame yourself for everything that happens to you. I am asking you to own the experience and own your reaction. Good and bad things happen to us in life, we don’t always control them, but what we can control is the way we react to them. We can own the experience and our reaction or we can let the incident define us and own us forever going forward.
If you don’t get this first principle right, you will always struggle to achieve success no matter what success looks like to you.
When you have self-esteem you give yourself the audacity to Dream Big.
Be Persistent and Consistent
Get up, dress up and show up no matter how good or bad things are.
In business and in life there are plenty of ups and downs. That’s life. If it was easy then everyone would be doing it.
If you want success you have to be fiercely persistent. Get knocked down, get up again and again and again. Believe in your dream, your goal, and your desires and just keep showing up.
In line with that you must deliver a consistent message. What you do day in day out, and the way you do it, will ultimately define how you’re perceived by those around you. By your family and loved ones, by your customers and works mates.
It’s easy to be consistent and show up when the tide is going your way but when the tide turns and tries to drag you backwards, then it’s time to knuckle down and show up as persistent and consistent as ever.
If you’re persistent you will get something, if you’re consistent you will keep it
You need to have a good understanding of what drives you, what your passion is. You know that thing that brings a smile to your face and puts a spring in your step whenever you think about it?
People have regularly told me they don’t know what their passion is, they don’t have a goal. I don’t believe that, I just believe that the stresses and pressures of life have made them forget where they wanted to be. They became responsible for life and other people (kids, house) and in the process have lost a little of themselves and their own identity.
Don’t do that.
Take some time out to get away and be by yourself and work out what your drive and passion is. If you could do anything in the world and money didn’t matter, then what would you do?
What are you good at? What do people value in you and what value can you provide to others? What makes you happy?
Honestly, take some time to focus on you because a happy you provides so much more happiness to those around you. You become a better parent, partner, workmate, boss or employee.
If you want to be an ANOMALY. Act like one.
Find a Mentor or Someone to Model
One of the best things I ever did personally, was to find mentors that I respected and I knew had walked the talk. I tried a few different business coaches in the early days of business and nothing seemed to work, but then I realized that the coaches I was trying had never been in business, had never known what it was like to deal with staff, pay GST, get their BAS done, owe the ATO or suppliers money.
I found that I needed someone who had done the tough yards, had experience and then worked through to the other side. That was a pivotal change in my business and saw me increase turnover and profit between 100% and 114% every year for three years straight.
Results like that are not an accident. They come from hard work and doing the hard yards, but it helps to have an amazing person to fall back on.
When kids play a sport you get them a coach. If kids struggle at school you get them a tutor. If they play a musical instrument you get them a music teacher. When they’re old enough to drive you get them lessons from a driving school.
Why is that when you’re struggling an area you just try to tough it out? You keep quiet, you lose sleep worrying about how to improve things, yet you never think to get someone to mentor you through the process. Are the kid’s tennis skills more important than your happiness? I mean, that’s what you’re saying to yourself.
You don’t have to recreate the wheel. Find someone that has achieved success in an area you want, or in a way that you want, and model them. This doesn’t have to be face to face, it can be through reading books, studying people, joining a positive group to getting a face to face coach/mentor. There are many ways to make this step work for you.
There’s a common belief that you resemble the five people you spend most of your time with. So if you find that you’re having regular coffee catch ups with a negative, bitchy group that talks about others when they’re not around, then you’re being influenced by this.
Choose your circle wisely. I am not suggesting cutting your family and friends list, but just be mindful of the amount of time you give to that environment because it is having an effect on you and where you’re at in life.
If nothing changes, then nothing changes.
Build a Support Group
Not everyone has a group or even an individual that offers them support and this can make life really difficult. Their next point of call is family and friends who don’t share their passion or vision. We’ve all been there. You tell then what you’re thinking of doing or what your vision is and they then recite every reason they can possibly think of as to why it’s a bad idea and why you shouldn’t do it.
Don’t take that personally. They’re actually trying to protect you from failing because they care, but failure is not fatal. If you’re learning then failure is actually a part of the process.
If you don’t have a support group then build one. You become the support for someone else or a group of like-minded people. You will soon find that when you help others, you will be inadvertently helping yourself. So join a group or start a group, just make it happen.
Give more than you take.
That’s how you win.
Be Whole in Your Approach
Be whole in your approach. There’s no such thing as being only focused on the thing you want to be successful in. If you do that then you’re losing touch with something else in your life.
For example, if you focus solely on business success and forget about your personal relationships, like your kids, your partner, or other significant people in your life, you could find that you make a lot of money and have really cool things only to find out that in a few years when you turn around you’ve lost your family or those closest to you.
A good mate once told me that our family don’t spell love is L.O.V.E but rather they spell it as T.I.M.E. They want to spend time with you which is far more important than a big house, nice car or endless holidays.
Similarly if you don’t find balance in your health, your nutrition and your fitness, then you might find that you have a great family life and a successful business but have a heart attack or other illness at 40 years old.
I once worked in the St Andrew’s Cardiac Unit and we regularly had 35-45yo’s coming in after heart surgery or heart attacks.
Be whole in your approach. Give balance to all the pieces of your life and if you find you’re getting out of balance, take the time to rectify. Success shared with those you love is far more meaningful in life than success sitting alone, or worse still success from a hospital bed.
If you can’t find time for your own health now, you will have no option when you’re unwell and can’t get up.
Find the balance.
T – The
G – Grind
I – Includes
F – Friday’s